Express & Star

Peter Rhodes on dodgy poppies, killer kids and the AI solution to old age

A reader is surprised at my piece on fake remembrance poppies for sale in shops and online. Surely, he asks, the Royal British Legion has some legal protection? If it has, then it seems to be widely ignored. Go online today and you'll find dozens of private operators selling poppies or poppy-themed merchandise purely for private gain.

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The real thing

At this time of year dodgy poppies are a huge blacklegging operation. In 2017 Border Force officers intercepted a shipment from China at Tilbury docks and found £150,000 worth of fake poppy-branded key rings, scarves and items of jewellery, intended to be sold for Remembrance Day. And that's probably the tip of a huge poppy-coloured iceberg.

If you want to buy the genuine articles go to the RBL website poppyshop.org.uk. Mind you, even the RBL offers no guarantee of good taste. Its merchandise range includes bizarre poppy-themed men's socks, dog blankets and a blingy metal gold-coloured poppy. But at least the profits go to RBL's good works, which is not the case with that shiny Shanghai poppy you've just found on eBay.

Yesterday's item on small children being unmoved by killing and eating animals reminds me of an old friend who took his little boy fly-fishing. He was worried that the lad might be distressed at the dispatching of trout and so he did the deed as discreetly as possible, using the little club known to anglers as a priest. The boy promptly burst into tears and yelled furiously: “No, Daddy! I wanted to bang it on the head.”

If we believe the evidence at the Covid inquiry, Boris Johnson asked colleagues why the British economy should be damaged “for people who will die anyway soon.” It is a fair question but not one that any politician should ever ask, especially if his or her words will one day be made public.

However, while humans may recoil from such questions, it's worth bearing in mind that before long an AI (Artificial Intelligence) program with perfect logic but zero compassion might not hesitate to ask it: Uncle Bill is 102. How much should the state pay to ensure he sees 103? Estimate, calculate, eradicate...?