Why the Force is no longer with me
In the 2001 Census I gave my religion as Jedi, writes Dan Wainwright.
In the 2001 Census I gave my religion as Jedi, writes Dan Wainwright.
I'd love to tell you that joining the 389,999 other people who did exactly the same thing was some sort of protest.
After all, people shouldn't have to feel pressured into choosing a religion or stating that they have none if they are still making their minds up about their place in the universe and their views towards a creator, real or imagined.
Likewise the optional question introduced on the last census may have been seen as an invasion of privacy or legimitising certain religions based on the number of adherents.
I didn't say I was a Jedi for that reason. Nor was it because I believed that fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate and hate leads to suffering although I probably wouldn't disagree with Master Yoda.
No. I said I was a Jedi for the same reason most other people did. I thought it would be a bit of a laugh if it became recognised as an official religion.
It wasn't. And after nothing more than a slight chuckle to myself and an equally geeky university friend I was living in halls with at the time we pretty much forgot all about it for 10 years.
Oh the shame and embarrassment of it all. It's true that I have downloaded the lightsaber app for my iPhone and that from time to time I will indulge in a little sound effect laden sword play if I think no-one's looking.
But beyond that I have not had the desire to dress up in robes, grab a piece of strip lighting and wander around town making noises with my mouth to mimic the "sshhhooom, sshhooom" of Obi Wan's "elegant weapon for a more civilised age". Although actually that does sound fun.
I do not complain in hotels that my room is a little "on the dark side" but there have been times I've been on the sofa and tried to turn Hollyoaks off by attempting to summon the remote towards me. Then again, who hasn't done that when Hollyoaks comes on?
Cabinet officer minister Francis Maude wants the national census scrapped because it costs £482 million and is an inaccurate way of measuring the number of people in Britain.
The dark side do we sense in him young Skywalker?
But I'm glad I have one last opportunity to set the record straight and give the correct answer when it comes to my religion, if only to wipe away the rather pointless stupidity of a clearly misspent youth.