Peter Rhodes on the dimbling Dimblebies, reading by flashlight and what cat-cafe cats do on a day off

SURNAMES sometimes pass into our language: sandwich, wellington, cardigan and boycott. Today, Labour MPs fear the latest probe into anti-semitism will be as much a whitewash as the last one, conducted by the former Director of Liberty who is now in the House of Lords. The word on the block is to avoid "another Chakrabarti."

AND here's a little phrase which may pass into common usage. To "dimble by" is to clear your desk and walk out of the office past your colleagues who believe you are retiring when actually you have no intention of doing any such thing. David and Jonathan Dimbleby have both announced their retirement from Question Time and Any Questions? respectively. Does anyone at the Beeb seriously think they have seen the last of the brothers? The hint on Today (Radio 4) this week was that there is plenty of work lined up for them. If the Lord spares them all, I confidently expect to see the BBC five years from now still employing the Dimblebies, John Humphrys and, of course, James Naughtie who vanished from Today three years ago but still keeps busy. He did not retire, he simply dimbled by.

AFTER last week's venture into a temperance bar, this week took us to Stratford which now has a cat cafe. The idea is that humans sip their tea and nibble their cakes while well-behaved cats pose and purr. This may strike some of you as a special corner of hell but cat cafes appear to be thriving. Nobody told us that the Stratford one is closed on Tuesdays. Behind the windows, the felines were taking a day off from being adorable. A tortoiseshell moggie seemed to be trying to rip the tail off a tabby, while a pure white cat was showing off its bottom at the window. More tea, vicar?

ON to our favourite shop in Stratford, the kitchenware emporium which has made its money selling you things you never imagined you could not live without. You have to applaud the sheer inventiveness of people who dream up wooden toast tongs for toasters and the banana drawstring storage bag. However did we manage before?

YET some bizarre purchases turn out to be wonderful. A reader tells me she's thrilled with the lamp on a headband she bought at a camping shop. It resembles a miner's helmet lamp and is perfect for reading in bed, if you don't mind looking like Joe Gormley (the miner, not the footballer). My reader has two queries. Why does this reading light have the option of a steady light or a flashing light? My guess is that reading during the flashes between the darkness enhances the suspense of a horror novel.

THE other query goes to the heart of global economics. How is it that the Chinese can manufacture, package and post a headband torch to be sold for £3 in an English high street, yet the minimum charge for posting it back to China is £10.10?