Work-shy are driving me slowly insane

Cuts to education? How about cuts in welfare payments to persuade my work-shy temping team to actually turn up for work? writes Charlie Cashdan.

It's that time of year again, the time when staying at home in the cosy warmth of your bed is much better than actually having to go to work. And for a lot of my new Christmas recruits, that's exactly what they choose to do.

They have lived quite happily on benefits for some time now and only agreed to do a little Christmas temping because the Job Centre sent them to me/they thought it might be fun/their mum made them apply.

So, as soon as things get a bit tough, my regular team of amazing temps get tough. The weak new recruits, however, just disappear back to the benefit system which they lived off before. And if you try to hold them accountable in some way for the mess they leave behind, they just threaten to sue or call the papers.

As an employer I have no power at all, I can't even get the staff to turn up or penalise them when they don't. It's pathetic, as if running a business in the UK isn't difficult enough with corporation tax, VAT, employer's national insurance, public liability, health and safety, maternity and paternity rights, minimum wage restrictions, working time directive, etc, etc, you also have to contend with a work-shy workforce.

Most popular excuses for not turning up this year involve sick relatives. Mainly grandparents, occasionally parents, often cousin/brother/sister/aunt. Why, oh why, are grandchildren expected to pull out of jobs because of a sick grandparent? Where are their parents in all this? Is it all just a pack of lies? Or am I just a hard-nosed cow for expecting people to put work first?

We've had people turn up then flounce off home because of someone's attitude towards them, happily pulling out of several weeks' worth of work because of a few misinterpreted sentences. Tossing aside the chance to earn hundreds of pounds.

Lots of people don't turn up due to 'family problems', which is absolutely infuriating.

We've had flu, food poisoning, tonsillitis, lots of chest infections (one person was in hospital for three weeks with a chest infection. My dad was only in hospital for a week with a heart attack!) Chest infection is clearly the illness of choice for this December, last year it was eye infection.

People turning up six hours late because they 'got the wrong bus ', it would be funny if it wasn't so tragic.

Other examples of common excuses for not turning up to work or for turning work down – I got arrested, I got locked in my house, forgot I was meant to be working today, is it today I'm meant to be working? Oh no, I thought it was tomorrow, visiting/taking a relative to hospital, on a tag so can't work after 6pm because it's past curfew time, would lose my benefits if I did more hours, no childcare, had an argument with my boyfriend, I've lost my purse/phone/credit cards, I'm going to a party instead, I've had to get an emergency hair appointment, etc, etc. Need I say more?

Work used to be a priority, the only way to provide decent food and shelter for yourself. Now, it seems to be an optional extra to be dropped at a moment's notice if something more fun or important turns up. How do we fix this? It has to be fixed because small companies like ours will just give up the end. This is costing us hundreds of pounds a day in lost revenue. And I'm going mad, slowly, literally, insane.