Greavsie's in top form

You want to know what's wrong with English football? Jimmy Greaves isn't running it, that's what.

For more than two hours last night the legendary striker laid waste to the cult of the modern footballer with a hat-trick of common sense, accumulated wisdom and a fair dollop of sharply tuned wit.

Now 66, Greavsie prowled the stage like a seasoned stand-up comedian for the first 45 minutes, throwing in bar-room jokes alongside hilarious tales of his playing days.

While admitting that Wolves were the team of the day when he started out, it was the friendly welcome awaiting the 'southern Chelsea softies' in Bolton that gave Jim some of his funniest comic moments.

Next up was the legendary Ron 'Chopper' Harris, who recalled Tommy Docherty's memorable team talk at a European match away in Germany: "Remember lads, some of these b******* tried to kill your parents."

When Jimmy returned for a second half question and answer session, all manner of football folklore was put under the microscope.

What shone through all evening was his genuine passion for the game and growing frustration with today's pampered, glove-wearing modern stars - views shared by the 500-strong audience in Stafford who were clearly in agreement throughout.