Peter Rhodes: Kick out religion

THINGS misunderstood when we were very young. A reader recalls hearing chit-chat about a family friend who owned a car. Apparently old Joe's big ends had gone and one of his trunnions was knackered. The lad watched old Joe closely, wondering whether this misfortune affected his walk.

EUROPE: Strangers on my Doorstep (Radio 4) was a fascinating study of a Swedish community of 8,000 people coping with the influx of 1,000 migrants. The tensions were obvious but there was a glimmer of hope. A local explained how when they first arrived, the Muslim kids prayed five times a day. Now, they play football instead. Many problems can be eased simply by removing religion.

THE latest theory on the migrant front is the notion that President Putin is deliberately increasing the number of refugees fleeing into Europe in order to wreck the EU. Two points. Firstly, if that was his aim, why would Putin wait four years before getting involved in the Syrian war? Secondly, if the Russian president wanted to take a swipe at the EU, who could possibly blame him? He has good reason to regard the EU as a hostile power. We still do not know what messages were sent or what assurances given by the posse of EU officials who mysteriously popped up in Kiev at the start of the Ukraine revolution. A few days ago, a Daily Telegraph column by the Falklands hero and former head of the Royal Marines Julian Thompson contained the blunt assertion: "EU diplomatic recklessness kicked off the Ukraine crisis." As with so many conflicts, we have not been told the full story.

THERE is much talk of "loopholes" and "dodgers" in the reporting of plans to change the TV licence law to catch those who watch catch-up telly. The truth is that smartphone technology has overtaken the rules. And that is because the rules were drafted in the post-war days of valves, nine-inch screens and horizontal hold (ask your granddad), which is where the TV licence rightfully belongs. It is an unfair, idiotic relic of the past and should be chucked in the rubbish bin of history.

WHERE Scotland goes, I bet England follows. The SNP plans to impose higher charges on the top council-tax bands. For some residents this will be an extra £10 a week – or £500 a year. Yet those affected are making hardly a peep of protest, possibly for fear of being denounced as rich – a hanging offence in some parts of Scotland. Meanwhile, Chancellor George Osborne is under pressure to cut income tax in his next Budget. Do not be surprised if income tax comes down but council tax goes up. Chancellors love putting money in your left pocket while taking money out of your right pocket.

BEING of a certain age, I naturally harrumph in outrage at the very suggestion that good old ear-ripping, eye-blacking, face-bending, character-forming tackles may be banned from school rugby, following a campaign by health professionals and others. And then I recall my own particular strategy for dealing with Rugby Union all those years ago. It was called hiding in the school library.

THE thing I noticed about rugby was that when our First and Second XV teams were playing away, the school, being empty of psychopaths, was a much nicer place.