Bring on the private-enterprise tax disc

IT doesn't really matter that Ed Miliband, or any other politician, forgets to mention the NHS or the recession in a conference speech. We have heard it all before.

BUT as the various party conferences try to outdo each other on NHS spending, never forget that the visionaries who created the NHS believed that, as people became healthier, the health service would need less money, not more. In 1948 some conditions could be managed only with cheap painkillers. Today the same conditions are treated with new drugs and therapies, at vast expense.

AND no-one ever dreamed that the Brits, having been shown the benefits of improved health, would then consume as much booze, sugar, fat and fags as they could get their hands on. Am I the only one who resents paying taxes to treat people who seem determined to be unhealthy?

WONDERFUL to see Plebs (ITV2) back. The second series about three no-hopers in ancient Rome (picture The Inbetweeners in a forum and you've got it) seems as sharp, rude and riotously funny as the first. But it is also more lavish with some expensive sets. So let me issue a soothsayer sort of warning: Beware the fate of Red Dwarf. When it first burst upon our screens in 1988, Red Dwarf was rough and ready with wobbly sets but it was original, fresh and funny. As the second and subsequent series came along, the sets and special effects improved but the comedy didn't.

YOU can't make comedy funnier simply by throwing money at it. In fact, Blackadder proved the opposite. The first series, filmed largely out of doors, was ruinously expensive at £1 million for six episodes and not all that funny. The later series, made in small studios, were cheap, cheerful and proved that a great script is a great script, even in the bottom of a trench.

FROM next week when you tax your car you won't get a paper tax disc. Instead, it will all be done digitally by the DVLA. You can either remove the existing tax disc from your vehicle or display it until it expires. So will you be binning yours? Me neither. As anyone who has watched those police documentaries knows, computer records are not perfect. It is not unknown for the cops to tow away a car for not being insured, even though it is fully covered. The tax disc is visible, tangible proof that we have paid our tax, so who in their right mind would throw away a valid one? Indeed, I wouldn't be surprised if some bright company starts producing private-enterprise documents with your DVLA reference number, details and receipt neatly printed on a small windscreen sticker. It could be circular. We could call it a tax disc.

CROOKS will simply find an identical vehicle to their own, have some duplicate number plates made and continue to dodge both tax and insurance - and who's ever going to know?

OFF to Hidcote Gardens in the continuing quest to wring our money's worth out of our £90 National Trust subscriptions. Hidcote, south of Stratford and within sight of both the Malverns and Cotswolds, was shimmering in the autumnal heatwave with eager, gardening types in short sleeves and Panamas, oohing and aahing at the trees and blossoms and bee-loud glades. The only thing spoiling England is the generally cold and wet climate. This year we've had a vision of how it might be if it were a few degrees warmer, and it is wonderful. Last weekend thousands of folk marched in London protesting about climate change. Ungrateful blighters.