Selling arms to the Russians

GREAT. So we now learn that British firms are selling military kit, including bullets and bomb-disposal armour, to the Russians. But the Government assures us they are the sort of bullets used for hunting, not shooting people. How long before we discover the Buk surface-to-air missile system which brought down the airliner over Ukraine uses widgets made in the West?

COME to think of it, when I was in the TA we were equipped with ancient radios containing valves made in Poland which was then part of the Warsaw Pact – the enemy.

I'M sure you're desperate to know how we got on with the curiously-named "traditional vegan sausages" I mentioned a couple of days ago. I'd love to give a detailed description but some words are not allowed in a family newspaper. Imagine a beige mush with a strange metallic aftertaste. The main thing, as any vegan will tell you, is that no organism suffered in the process. Apart, that is, from the people who ate them. I suspect if you are a vegan, misery is part of the fun.

AND off, on a blissfully warm summer's evening, to the Royal Shakespeare Theatre where Stratford Coughing Society seems to be out in force. One person coughs and two or three others join in. Some are subdued "ahems" but others simply cough, hackety-hack, open-mouthed over the folks in front. This is probably nothing new. In the excellent 1998 film Shakespeare in Love, the Bard (Joseph Fiennes) rages: "You see? The consumptives plot against me. 'Will Shakespeare has a play, let us go and cough through it'."

SO there is to be a full inquiry into the death by poisoning in 2006 of the former KGB agent Alexander Litvinenko . Any chance of an inquiry into the death of Dr David Kelly who was found dead during the Iraq war inquiry in 2003? I guess not. How strange it is that the death of a foreigner, probably murdered by his own people, gets proper attention but our own Dr Kelly, a national hero and a hugely principled man, has been denied even an inquest.

ONE of the most impressive statistics to emerge from the Ukraine airline disaster is that at the moment it happened, on a pretty average flying day, there were an estimated 10,000 airliners in the skies. Those Wright Brothers really started something.

A READER who happens to be a retired cop, complains bitterly about the lack of interest, let alone response, he got from dialling the 101 non-emergency number. This alternative to 999 is, quite literally, a cop-out. According to the Police UK website, "non-emergency" incidents for which 101 is deemed suitable are: Your car has been stolen, your property damaged or if you suspect drug use or dealing in your neighbourhood. And if you spot fly-tipping or damage of public property, the cops don't want to know about it at all. Apparently such incidents are a matter for your local council. There is no better way to cut crime than to decriminalise criminal behaviour. And you wonder why the figures for recorded crime keep falling?

A BUILDER in Northamptonshire has been jailed for indecent exposure after flashing at elderly customers. On one contract, the court heard, he wore nothing but boots and socks and was clearly aroused. On another occasion he exposed himself while building a garden shed. The prosecution lawyer said of one customer: "She could not understand why he was so aroused, as they were talking about planters at the time." It is a mystery. When gardeners talk dirty it usually involves growbags.