Peter Rhodes: A shamrock for remembrance?

RESEARCH shows that children raised with dogs are far less likely to get asthma. Mind you, they are far more likely to get their shoes chewed.

THE significance of the sweet little Labrador puppy in the closing moment of Sunday's Downton Abbey (ITV)? In the Downton Christmas special the entire dynasty and their servants die of rabies. You read it here first.

ONE-quarter of cancers in Britain are discovered when the patient is taken to A&E, according to figures released a couple of days ago. The official explanation is that UK cancer diagnosis takes too long and that GPs fail to recognise the symptoms and send the patient to see a consultant. But is that the whole answer? Cancer has a unique power to frighten us and people can react strangely to fear. Some will rush to their doctors. Others will pretend it isn't happening. Some may go into denial, convincing themselves that this new lump, or unexplained pain, is nothing. And a few may know exactly what is happening and choose to do nothing. Any GP will tell you of intelligent, articulate patients who decide to let events take their course, either through fear of the treatment or pure bloody-mindedness. The missing statistic from this week's report is how many patients in A&E, on being told they have late-stage, incurable cancer, reply: "Yes, I thought it might be that." We can beat some cancers but there is no cure for fatalism.

CLOTHES, papers, mementoes and handbags owned by Lady Thatcher are to be sold at Christie's. The event spurs the Daily Telegraph into full Maggie-love gush mode with this announcement: "A remarkable collection of 350 items is set to be broken up with the blessing of Lady Thatcher's family, to be shared with the public at auction." Shared? Oh, come off it. This is a commercial venture. Things are being bought, not shared. The Iron Lady was a stickler for correct English. She would never have confused "share it" with "flog it."

CONOR McGregor, the Irish martial-arts champ, was pictured wearing a remembrance poppy and promptly accused by an online troll of "selling out the Irish people." In response, McGregor raged that he didn't need "a stupid little flower" to justify his beliefs. He ended: "**** you and the Queen," which is at least even-handed.

A FEW days after the McGregor poppy row erupted, I bumped into an old Irish friend wearing something I had never seen before. It was an enamel badge showing a British Legion poppy set against a shamrock. I suggested this rare blend of British and Irish symbols could start a few pub fights. "In some pubs," she smiled, knowingly.

THE wacky world of meteorology. Strange, isn't it, that the weather experts who tell us with absolute certainty that temperatures 30 years from now will be precisely 2.4 degs C higher than they are today, and that the coming winter will be one of the coldest ever, were quite unable, even 48 hours before the events, to forecast this week's pea-souper fogs and Wales's warmest November day of all time? If they can't get next week right, why should we trust them on 2045?

PS: Nasa scientists have discovered that the Antarctic ice, which was supposed to be shrinking as a result of climate change, is actually getting bigger. That'll be global-warming freezing, then.