Oh, the wickedness of the Lords

ANACHRONISM Abbey. Thanks for your suggestions of unlikely things to have been said in 1925 in Downton. Two front-runners are the discussion about a man who "brings something to the table" and the notion that the expensive old mansion "doesn't wash its face."

A READER says he lives in hope of the Dowager Countess addressing the family as "You guys." Wait for the Christmas special.

IF the mighty Catthorpe Interchange of the M1, M6 and A14 were closer to London, there would have been huge coverage of its partial reopening a few days ago. As it is, there has been barely a whisper that the westbound lane, taking drivers from the A14 to the M6, is now operational. And after months of queuing, what a joy it is. Catthorpe, near Rugby, is one of Britain's crucial strategic interchanges, coping with traffic from eastern England, the West Midlands and the North. For millions of folk, travel suddenly got easier, but there was barely a word in the so-called national media. North of Watford, innit?

OUR changing language. A new restaurant near us is advertising for staff who must be "epic team members." Which presumably means prepared to work for the minimum wage and pool all their tips.

OH, the wickedness of the unelected House of Lords. These grizzled old, unaccountable dinosaurs have scuppered George Osborne's plan to scrap tax credits and the Tory press erupts in fury, denouncing this cynical assault on a democratically elected government. Which is all very well but I seem to remember on the occasions that their Lordships stood up to the Blair government, the Tory press applauded them as Britain's heroic last bastion of common sense, decency and all that stuff.

BUT the lesson is learned . Even if the sums add up, if you are a government with a majority of 12, there is not a cat in hell's chance of being able to save £4,000 million by taking £1,300 from lots of poor people. Osborne will have to find his billions elsewhere. If you are a pensioner on the higher rate of tax, be very afraid.

AFTER my recent item on the curious difference between young people "falling" while old people "have a fall," a reader asks: "What about women falling pregnant?" This is dangerous territory. I found this in an internet discussion: "Fall pregnant is usually used to imply it was unplanned but can also be used in ultra-polite or conservative circumstances to disassociate the event from the act of intercourse."

SPARE us the surprise and the big, panicky headlines over the World Health Organisations' latest claim that bacon and other processed meats can cause cancer. If you have the Full English Breakfast often enough, it may turn into the Full English Tumour. But this is not news. The link between meat, especially processed meat, and cancer has been known for years. A study of 500,000 Europeans concluded that those who eat two portions of meat a day increase their risk of bowel cancer by more than a third compared to those who eat it once a week. And that was in 2005. How quickly we choose to forget information we don't like. Or maybe bacon is seriously bad for your memory.

GOLDEN rule of food: if it tastes good, it's bad.