Prisoner leaves hilarious Trip Advisor-style review of his stay in the cells

The 24-year-old was taken to the 60-cell suite in Perry Barr, Birmingham, on the evening of June 29 after being arrested for alledged criminal damage in Erdington.

He was charged the following day but before his release he asked for a pen and composed a review based on his 16-hour visit.

In his report he comments on "how modern and clean the building looks" and praises the attentive service by staff applauding how he was "dealt with promptly by a custody officer and shown to a cell".

He continues: "Once in my cell I was pleasantly surprised by the cleanliness and décor…neutrally decorated to please all parties but done to a high standard."

The balanced summary did raise concerns over a hair found near the en-suite toilet ? athough the author later admitted it was probably his own ? and felt that cups of tea could have been provided more promptly.

He rounded off by thanking custody staff for providing a pen and paper to allow him to put his review in writing.

Chief Inspector Paul Minor, West Midlands Police Criminal Justice Manager, said: "We feel it's a five-star facility: it's designed to be safer for staff and guests and the more efficient check-in process means we can get arresting officers back out on the streets more quickly.

"The cells have cameras, anti-graffiti surfaces, and reflective ceiling domes so occupants can be seen at all times… it means officers aren't tied up on cell-door watch so can be out on patrols protecting the public.

"The reviewer has been very complimentary about the facility and staff… but I think he's been a little harsh by awarding it just a three-star rating!"

The Perry Barr custody building opened at the end of May as part of a multi-million pound modernisation project ? and followed the launch of its sister suite in Oldbury in March.

In addition to the 60 cells there are dedicated facilities for partner agencies specialising in mental health, substance misuse and immigration.

The central hub for booking in detainees features six desks instead of the standard two ? minimising the risk of backlogs and officer delays ? while all areas of the building are monitored using cameras, intercoms and alarm panels on every wall.

Modern digital equipment has been incorporated for processing fingerprints and photographs and digital recording equipment fitted into interview rooms.

The building houses detainees mainly from across Birmingham but also has additional office space to accommodate officers and staff involved in criminal investigations.