Express & Star

New Top Gear team revealed

So, a comedian and a former England cricket captain have been rolled out as the new presenters of Top Gear.

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The newTop Gear team

And in this sad and sorry age of celebrity, that perfectly qualifies them for the job.

Paddy McGuinness and Andrew Flintoff, who will take over from Friends star Matt LeBlanc after the next series, are two of my favourite people, absolute naturals who will no doubt send the viewing figures sky-high.

But how much will we learn about cars? How much will the programme really be a vehicle for the celebs themselves?

It's the same with holiday programmes.

There I am, looking forward to a wet week in Wales, a break from the daily office grind and tragic A454 Willenhall Road commute. Then I switch on my telly, jaded and famished, to find yet another famous face fronting up another excuse for a travel programme on an exotic all-expenses-paid trip.

Possibly the worst ever was Tom Daley Goes Global, when a camera team followed the nice but boring Olympic diver and his best friend cavorting around Australia, New Zealand, Thailand, Japan and Morocco on a gap-year style adventure.

It was a terrible idea, dropped after one series, made only vaguely interesting by how bad it was.

Then there was Joey Essex let loose in Kruger National Park in South Africa, before flying over to Brazil ahead of the World Cup. Sue Johnston journeyed to Tibet in search of Shangri-La, Ewan McGregor crossed Africa on a motorbike, Paul Merton toured India, the list is endless.

It shows a profound lack of imagination and creativity on the the part of commissioners and trivialises the subject. It's a massive cop-out.

Even chefs can't confine themselves to a kitchen these days. Dishes are rustled up at a Tuscan roadside, a market in Madagascar, or the foothills of the Himalayas.

We all love Joanna Lumley but how blindingly uninspired is it to send her to India, Japan and, on her latest romp, along the Silk Road through Venice, Turkey, Azerbaijan, Uzbekistan and Kyrgyzstan.

It's like watching someone better off than us enjoy a free holiday. It's not a winning formula to get people on your side.

On the basis we would watch the gushing but charming Joanna in just about anything, it would be cheaper and a lot more more interesting to see how she and the other celebs fare in the likes of Blackpool, Barmouth or Weston-super-Mare.

I'm not holding my breath.