Peter Rhodes on Christmas shopping, the Gibraltar question and those clean-green ideas that went nowhere

SELECT, click, pay. And that's all my Christmas shopping sorted, without even leaving the computer screen. Yes, I know we should be supporting our local shops but there is no shop within five miles offering the vast range of el cheapo bling I am buying my nearest and dearest this yuletide.

I HAVE wistful memories of traditional Xmas shopping in the big store in the middle of town on Christmas Eve. Everyone exuded goodwill and the whole place reeked cheerfully of hot rum punch and gratis mince pies. And then you remember how brutally expensive everything was. The big store pleading for my support today is the same big store that, in my youth, robbed me on a weekly basis and at Xmas took a great slab of my December pay packet in exchange for grossly over-priced fripperies. Today, the power has shifted. We are eager addicts of eBay, Amazon and PayPal.

BEING rather old-fashioned, Mrs Rhodes and I still have the joint bank account we opened at about the time woolly mammoths vanished. We pay for our online purchases with PayPal and settle the monthly bill with our Visa card on the joint account. This means everything we buy for each other is, in effect, paid for by each of us and that familiar Xmas-morning exclamation "Oh, you shouldn't have!" is spoken with real passion.

NO, I'm not surprised Gibraltar turned out to be a sticky issue in the Brexit talks. It was bizarre that the Irish border issue grew into some enormous, epoch-changing affair which threatened civil war while Gibraltar, a genuine source of international conflict, appeared to have been sidelined by ticking a couple of boxes. In fact there were too many loose ends. The Spanish, who have spent 305 years moaning about the British enclave on their doorstep, don't want anything in the Brexit deal that locks Gib to Whitehall for another three centuries. I dare say some agreement will be made but how odd that during two years of haggling, no-one saw the Rock looming over the horizon.

THE "Star Wars" electric aircraft unveiled a few days ago is powered by a phenomenon called ionic wind. The surprise is that ionic wind was first investigated by scientists nearly 100 years ago. So what's new? The past century is littered with clean, green solutions to transport and energy that were discovered, and then abandoned in favour of filthy, fossil-fuel guzzlers which pour crud into our oceans and make the city air unbreathable. Imagine what a wonderful world it would be if hydrogen motors, electric cars and solar-powered generators had been developed instead of petrol, diesel, coal and oil-fired industries. On second thoughts, don't. It will only depress you.

RETURNING to Xmas purchases, it still pays to shop around. A contributor to our neighbourhood website texted that one shop in town was advertising turkey at £8.99 but another shop was asking £450. Later he admitted that the first shop was Bob the Butcher and the second shop was Thomas Cook.