Peter Rhodes on floating hotels and funny film titles

IN this Conference season I am bemused, as always, by the eagerness of Corbyn, May and even Vince Cable to be prime minister. No matter who wins the next general election, the lesson of history is that two years later, he or she will be the most despised person in Britain.

JANE Fonda and Robert Redford star in a carelessly-named Netflix drama. As the Daily Telegraph points out, Our Souls at Night may sound lyrical to American ears but "has a rather unfortunate ring to it on this side of the Atlantic."

NOT that it's the first time "our" has been conjoined with "souls," producing much giggling in the cinema. In the 1939 classic Wuthering Heights, Cathy (Merle Oberon), obsessed with Heathcliff (Laurence Olivier) declares breathlessly: "Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same." I am sure they are, dear.

INCIDENTALLY, it is not unknown for the Yanks to change a film's title to suit their sensitivities. One famous 1944 British drama was released in the States as Man of Evil. In Britain it was Fanny by Gaslight.

I WROTE last week about my trip to Vietnam all those years ago. In Saigon, or Ho Chi Minh City, we stayed on the world's first floating hotel. It's the only hotel I've ever visited where the wardrobe contained a lifejacket. As Vietnam's tourist industry boomed and more hotels were built, "The Floater" was no longer needed. It is currently moored at Mount Kumgang in North Korea. In these troubled times I wonder whether the wardrobes contain lifejackets or steel helmets.

EXCEPT that the times may not be quite as troubled as we think. It emerged at the weekend that there are "direct links" between Washington and Pyongyang. In other words, they are talking. How long, I wonder, before the two worst haircuts in the world come together?

A READER writes: "Your rant about insurance was very timely as this morning my wife received her car insurance renewal quote,which was £69 more than last year. I make this an increase of about 27 per cent. She then followed the same procedure as several previous years, phoning them and asking them what they could really do it for. The result was an immediate quote of £9 more than last year. When asked why they couldn't have done this straight away the reply was "it varies from day to day". In my opinion the reason they do this is that they know very well that some silly blighters will just pay it."

RANT? Me?

PS: He didn't actually write "blighters."