Express & Star

Peter Rhodes: Pugh, Pugh...

THE passing of a great voice, the endless savagery of the Middle East and praying for broadband.

Published
Brian Cant - unforgettable

MY item this week on non-punctuated road signs which can have several meanings reminds a reader of the crucial difference between “What is this thing called love?” and “What is this thing called, love?”

TUCKED away, and I dare say virtually unnoticed, in the Daily Telegraph this week was an In Memoriam announcement. It recalled that 50 years ago, eight members of 60 Squadron, Royal Corps of Transport, were among 23 British soldiers killed in a rebellion in Aden. It was a small but timely reminder of the age-old belief of some politicians that they can solve all the problems of the Middle East by sending young men to their deaths. In the next few weeks there will probably be an announcement that Raqqa has been liberated and the Islamic State is no more. And then what? The eternal lesson of this troubled region is that when you destroy one form of barbarity, you don't create peace. You create a vacancy.

SOME voices stay with you all your life. My generation will never forget Oliver Postgate narrating the saga of Noggin the Nog, or Shirley Abicair singing about the Little Boy Fishing. For a later generation, the voice of the Play School and Play Away presenter Brian Cant will endure. Cant's death was announced this week. He was 83 and I bet, even now, you can hear his soft, beautifully modulated voice as he introduced Trumpton's firemen: “Pugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew, Cuthbert, Dibble, Grub.”

I ONCE heard a wicked rumour that when full-time firefighters saw their part-time retained colleagues arriving at an incident, the whisper would go around: “Pugh, Pugh . . .”

SHIRLEY Abicair? Still alive and well and living in Melbourne, aged 86.

WHEN he urged the homeless of Grenfell Tower to occupy empty properties in Kensington, Jeremy Corbyn must have known he was encouraging them to break the law. If the bewildered, shellshocked survivors of the inferno actually followed his advice they could end up in the sort of accommodation that has bars on the windows. As the Government's own website puts it: “Squatting in residential buildings (like a house or flat) is illegal. It can lead to 6 months in prison, a £5,000 fine or both.”

UPDATE on my BT broadband. I had a phone call from a lady explaining they had been monitoring the line and had detected a fault which was now fixed. And they would continue monitoring the line for the next 14 days. For the time being at least, my outage is once again an innage.

ON the phone to BT, I probably sounded grateful but when will the technology become reliable enough for us to switch on the computer without first uttering a prayer? The present set-up discriminates against us unbelievers.

AS the first proper survey reveals the impact of the youth vote on the General Election, the message for any future Conservative government is plain: 1) Under no circumstances hold an election during university term time. 2) If 1) is impossible then immediately raise the voting age to 60.