Boris Johnson’s chumocracy is great at promoting its mates, whether or not they’ve the skills for the job, while Number 10 Dysfunction Street is great at grabbing all the headlines over Eastenders-style fall-outs while the rest of the nation assesses mass unemployment, impoverished finances and the gap between rich and poor.
“But Boris, he called me Princess Nut Nuts,” “I know, Carrie. That’s why I fired him.” “And Boris, he made Allegra cry. That nasty wasty man.”
Ah yes. It’s not a sackable offence to preside over the highest Covid death rate in Europe, to make a complete Horlicks of test and trace, to oversee the worst economic hit in the world, to mess up the A-levels and to U-turn more often than the toilet fitting aisle at B&Q. It is, however, a sackable offence to be mean to Carrie. Cummings may have conned the public on Brexit – but the man who sold the lie is still there.
Mind you, BoJo and his cronies are not the only ones who’ve lost their mojo – 2020 was doing a really good job of being the worst year on record, what with climate-warming, wildfires, Covid-19, the worst economic crash in 300 years and an inept Government that can’t handle exams, Brexit or anything beyond giving its best mates really lucrative jobs. Oh, we failed to mention the madness of President Trumpton, of the USA, and his team of crack advisors; Pugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew, Cutherbert, Dibble and Grubb.
And yet the worst year ever is wavering. A vaccine looms more prominently into view each day, President Trumpton seems to be opting for a bad loser admission of defeat at last Super Dom has sailed off to look at the bluebells of Barnard Castle.
Marcus Rashford is everything that is extraordinary. He truly is a Great Briton. And so we might wonder what the Daily Mail has against a young, community-minded professional footballer to denigrate his campaigning efforts by conflating a campaign to feed hungry kids with the news that he invests his wages in property. The Mail ran a campaign to knight David Beckham for his charity work while Man City’s Phil Foden was an angel for buying his mum a luxury home. Why don’t they like Marcus?