"He looks as though he is thoroughly enjoying it. But she's on the wrong foot and carrying a handbag. She must be a New Zealand gal. What do you expect from the colonies?" - Len Goodman, of Strictly Come Dancing fame, after studying a photograph of the Prince of Wales dancing with a girl during a southern hemisphere tour.
"I'm a drummer, but I can do other things. Like painting, living, breathing" - Ex-Beatle Ringo Starr on being appointed a Commander of France's Order of Arts and Letters.
"They are always mad about it. They see red boxes as the enemy. They don't like them. They tend to kick these red boxes" - The Prime Minister on his children's attitude to his job.
"The last time I saw her she clasped me and covered me with false kisses. Dreadful woman. God almighty" - Tory peer Baroness Trumpington on ex-Conservative MP Edwina Currie.
"For the first time in years I wished I was in Parliament" - London's mayor Boris Johnson.
"Contemptible. Just rubbish., It is beyond my understanding that the National Portrait Gallery should exhibit such things. I hope to God that he sings better than he draws" - Art critic Brian Sewell on an exhibition of Bob Dylan's works.
"I don't believe women have affairs for no reason. Women don't seek sex. We seek love and affirmation" - Actress Amanda Holden.
"I would rather do one hour of sex than have to eat all that food again" - Blue movie star Adele Exaerchopoulos, who was not impressed by the spaghetti bolognese or the kebabs while shooting a film.
"I said to him, I didn't have a clue who you were, and then I Googled you and you've been in quite a lot of films" - D-Day veteran Peter Comfort on meeting Brad Pitt, who was seeking advice on a film he was making about the landings.
"With Bond, you would be mad not to take any role. I would even play the dog" - Joanna Lumley is anxious to return to 007 films.
"When I was editor of the Erotic Review I fielded endless phone calls from elderly readers who thought I might like to pop round in my spare time and thrash them" - Rowan Pelling.