Paul Weitz (About A Boy) directs and co-writes this spooky fantasy based on the popular series of books by Darren Shan.

With the second film in the Twilight saga, The New Moon, poised to wax and wane in cinemas from November 20, The Vampire’s Assistant is perfectly timed to sink its fangs into the same teenage market.

Shan has penned 12 books, divided into four trilogies, so the scope for a long-running franchise to rival Stephenie Meyer’s romances is evident.

However, this family-friendly yarn is a largely bloodless affair, solely designed to set the scene for future films.

By spending so much time looking forward, screenwriters Weitz and Brian Helgeland neglect to sketch characters in sufficient detail.

While many of the supporting cast gnaw unabashedly on scenery, leading man Massoglia is insipid as our guide to a magical world where anything should be possible.

High-achieving teenager Darren (Chris Massoglia) has devoted most of his time to his schoolwork, scoring straight As to the delight of his parents (Don McManus, Colleen Camp).

His best friend Steve (Josh Hutcherson) is far less dedicated to academic excellence, and suggests the two boys bunk off school.

While walking around town, they learn about a visiting freak show and both youngsters slip out in the dead of night to attend the circus run by the aptly named Mr Tall (Ken Watanabe).

Loner Steve recognises one of the acts, magician Larten Crepsley (John C Reilly), as a vampire.

When the rebellious student is subsequently injured from a spider bite, Darren agrees to become a member of the undead in exchange for saving his buddy’s life.

The teen fakes his own death then moves to the freak’s compound, where he shares a tent with Evra The Snake Boy (Patrick Fugit) and falls under the spell of monkey girl Rebecca (Jessica Carlson).

Little does Darren know that Mr Tiny (Michael Cerveris) and his underling Murlaugh (Ray Stevenson) have recruited Steve to the deadly vampaneze group, and they intend to manipulate the youngster to shatter the 200-year-old truce between the rival vampire factions.

Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant begins in style with an eerie animated credits sequence.

The screenwriters appropriate plot threads from Shan’s opening trilogy without due care, hurriedly shoe-horning protagonists into a narrative that unfolds in fits and spurts.

Massoglia’s (fittingly) lifeless performance leaves Weitz’s film without an emotional heart, and we remain outsiders to the world of the bearded lady Madame Truska (Salma Hayek) and computer-generated Gollum-like creatures who welcome strangers by biting their hand.

Reilly is poorly served by the script, and he struggles to find a rhythm in brief exchanges with his co-star.

The romance between Darren and Rebecca is almost an afterthought, and certainly doesn’t kindle the same passion as Edward and Bella in Twilight – they would eat The Vampire’s Assistant for breakfast.

• Release Date: Friday 23 October 2009
• Certificate: 12A
• Runtime: 108mins

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