Walsall blogger Mark Jones’ vivid imagination dreams up the scenarios if Saddlers stars past and present were ever involved in the Olympics.

I have to pay tribute to the phenomenal performance of the British Olympic Team these last two weeks.

The medals haul has been a fitting reward for the combination of talent, dedication and commitment, allied with good coaching and the necessary financial backing.

It’s also given me the perfect opportunity to come up with some completely imaginary and tenuous Olympic events that Walsall stars past and present could do.

Competition as follows: -

Mark Rees and Rod McDonald could have been contenders in the sprints…or the martial arts.

In the current team, Jabo Ibehre is built like a heavyweight and Ishmel Demontagnac proved that he’d got a good right hook at Forest a couple of years back.

Pole Vault: Ray Graydon because took us to new heights on more than one occasion.

Hammer: John Keister after that bit of road rage on the M54.

Shot Put: Ian Roper heavily lumped it forward.

Decathlon: Chris Marsh, as he did just about every job while he was a Saddler.

10,000 metres: Mark Robins, running round and round in circles, very slowly.

Weightlifting: Tommy Mooney, Matty Fryatt, Jorge Leitao and, back in the day, Stuart Rimmer. They all had spells where they carried our attack.

Judo: Simon Osborn. I watched him week in, week out, yet couldn’t work out what he was supposed to be doing.

Dressage: Steve Corica, a show pony poncing about. (Then again he could be a boxer – a lightweight of course.)

Synchronised Swimming: Mark Wright and Eddy Sonko, they obviously worked very hard to do what they do but no-one really wanted to watch them.

Gymnastics: Nobody but Craig Pead could be a coach (think about it).

Walking or Swimming (well the Crawl anyway): Loads of washed up old has-beens could have fitted the bill for this. I’ll plump for Craig Burley, Gary Porter and Wayne Clarke.

BMX: Scott Dann and Dan Fox, youngsters doing well who are soon on their bike. (At least we’ll have plenty more on this team in the future).

Small bore shooting: David Zdrilic and Dave Bamber (it was a bore watching them trying to shoot anyway).

Triathlon: The 98/99 Promotion Team, there seemed to be nothing to them but they just kept going and finished way ahead of the competition.

High Jump: Richard Money, he was probably for it once he asked for some funds.

Canoeing: Paul Merson … maybe not, seeing as he left us up a creek.

Sailing: The Board, they couldn’t fail with all the hot air you get from them.

Cycling: Us Walsall Fans, we’re used to being taken for a ride.

Last but not least, rowing: Colin Lee, for the way he took us backwards so quickly.

London 2012 has a tough act to follow, everyone wants it to succeed but you worry about the young stars living up to expectations, the seats being filled and whether those in charge are up to the job … or is that Walsall 2008?

(Acknowledgments to Steve and Ross for all the really bad puns, anything you don’t like is probably down to them.)