Two rules should be observed when sporting a pair of long-johns. First, avoid passing in front of mirrors or any other reflective surfaces until they are concealed by a pair of trousers.

No matter who you are, long johns have the knack of making us all look like Albert Steptoe.

The second rule is never reveal you are wearing them.

Men – even those benefitting from extra trouser lagging themselves – will ridicule you. Women will shun you.

Sadly having started off on this tack it goes without saying that I am about to break rule number two.

Yes, over the last couple of days, I have called on a trusty pair of LJ’s which have served me well during my time reporting on football up and down the country.

In my defence against the inevitable accusation of southern limp wristedness I should like to point out that I have only just recovered from a particularly aggressive cold bug which left me sofa-ridden for two days this week, keeping me off work (hence another blog shortfall).

So staying warm during yesterday’s snowfall was of pararmount importance. Everyone should be allowed a little leeway to deal with the icy conditions.

But on that score my long-johns pale into insignificance when you consider the extraordinary round of school closures sparked by the heavy snow.

In neighbouring Birmingham the kind of weather which was a regular occurrence when even people of my age (34) were still at school was greeted with apocolyptic panic and every single school in the city was shut down.

What happened to the days when all the snow meant was having to don a pair of wellies instead of your school shoes and potentially having to dry your socks off on the classroom radiator?

When pressed on his decision during an interview on Five Live, Les Lawrence – the city council’s cabinet member for education – rather flimsily argued that kids today are “conditioned differently” to those of us from previous generations.

Well it’s hardly flippin’ surprising when they are mollycoddled in a manner that would make Little Lord Fauntleroy feel over-pampered.

Yesterday’s rampant bit of nanny-stateism in Brum just added to that “conditioning” process which seems to be all about insulating kids from anything that could be deemed a harsh reality, protecting them from the notion that life sometimes throws up situations outside our comfort zone.

What message did yesterday send out to kids whose schools closed?

Well from where I’m sitting it was that at the first sign of snow we should barricade ourselves into our homes, fire up the plasma screens and PlayStations, allow society to grind to a halt and don’t come out until the authorities say it’s safe.

Such decisions shape the mindset of a generation of kids who are tomorrow’s political leaders and captains of industry.

God knows how they’ll deal with a bad winter in, say, 20 years when the baton of power has passed to them.

Maybe global warming won’t be such a bad thing after all.

Although I’ll miss my long-johns.

• Andy Toft is the Express & Star’s video journalist. Read other entries in his blog by clicking here
  
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