Carl Jones: Surprise TV gem has us all turning into critics
My wife reckons we'd make a perfect partnership on Gogglebox, that crazy Channel 4 show where Britain's most opinionated viewers let down their guards and pass biting judgement on the week's TV programmes from the safety of their own front rooms.
She thinks we'd be dead ringers for Stephanie and Dominic Parker, that curmudgeonly middle-aged duo who spend many a semi-sozzled night on the sofa, gigantic glass of booze in hand, dissecting the latest offerings.
It hadn't occurred to me before, but ever since Mrs Jones mentioned it, I've caught myself passing those very same sort of barbed comments, leaping onto my high horse about the smallest, most irrelevant thing.
On I'm A Celebrity, for example: "So much for Olympic stars being at the peak of physical fitness. Why's Rebecca Adlington taking part when she seems to have been ruled out of almost all the trials on medical grounds? If pensioners Laila Morse and David Emanuel were up for them, surely she's capable too.
"And what kind of programme encourages us to fall in love with a 23-year-old dimwit who's never learned to tell the time or blow his nose, doesn't know what a punchline is, and seems incapable of reading any word with more than five letters? If Joey Essex is what we're holding up as a role model for youngsters, it's a sad indictment on society."
On the reunion we thought we'd never see; the return of Monty Python: "How can you be expected to laugh out loud at their shows when it's glaringly obvious they're past it, and are only doing it now because some of them are strapped for cash? There's nothing funny about comedy shows born out of desperation. Just how gullible are the public."
No-one's safe. ITV's News At Ten comes on, and it happens again: "Can't somebody tell anchorman Mark Austin that the sleeves on his suit are always three inches too short?"
Then Question Time: "Stop political point-scoring, and just answer the b*****y question."
The list goes on . . .
On paper, Gogglebox sounds like a crazy idea. After all, who on earth would want to watch a TV programme featuring other people watching TV programmes, and then talking about the TV programmes they've just been watching?
But it's totally disarming. In the comfort and security of their homes, people are far more inclined to say what they really think.
Gogglebox's reviewers take you down some pretty profound alleys at times, and it's a credit to the producers that they just let them go, keeping the cameras rolling. We get sloppy romance, hard-hitting sex talk, and some very deep discussions on mortality; each time, tearing off the wrapping paper and getting right to the core of the issue, which is always the same – what does this programme mean to the lives of you and I?
When it comes to a show like Question Time, politicians would do well to take heed; Gogglebox is a brilliant illustration of how tired the nation is becoming of parrots in suits, pulling down glib, off-the-shelf answers to toe their party line.
If you've never watched it, give the show a try. It's bound to make you smile. And the producers have assembled such a diverse hotch-potch of contributors, covering such a cavernous demographic, that everyone, everywhere will find a potential soulmate.
