My views on methods of communication have already been documented, particularly when it comes to those crazed texters and tweeters, writes Our Grumpy Old Man Bill McCarthy.

I suppose they are reasonably harmless with their gormless ramblings, just  annoying as their fingers whiz over their phone keypads. What is worse are the loudmouths who seem to think their phone conversations are something we should all by privy to.

Dom Joly on Trigger Happy TV bellowing into a huge dummy phone got it spot on.

These ignorant oafs are particularly abhorrent on trains, where the mind-numbing tedium of their lives is laid bare before everyone in the carriage and one call is never usually enough for them. Like most loud-mouthed gorillas, particularly those in suits, signs asking them to refrain from using mobiles are treated with sneering contempt.

Even outside, sitting in a pub garden for instance, you find yourself wondering why these motormouths bother with a phone in the first place. With the amount of decibels produced they could probably be heard on Mars.

It’s no wonder normally mild-mannered people affected by these blabbermouths  take the law into their own hands and turn to phone rage.

It should be the law that when these attention seekers disturb public sensibilities, their phones should immediately be sent where the sun doesn’t shine.

*******

Is there anything more annoying than able-bodied people parking in disabled bays? Yes, people on their own parking in mother-and-baby slots.

The disabled are likely to get a sympathetic hand from passers-by, mums with their hands full with a  brood of anklebiters are more usually treated as scumbags taking up valuable parking space right next to the shops, by the goons that create all the misery with mobile phones,

On that matter, the pensioner who shoved a car parked in front of his  garage onto the road with his own car has been done for dangerous driving. This is despite extreme provocation with people on the school run constantly block his garage door.

The offending parker was collecting children from the nearby school. As anyone who drives past schools at opening and closing time knows, parents seem to think they can abandon their cars anywhere.

They are usually the ones with ‘child on board’ stickers, which they seem to think is a coverall for any kind of obnoxious road behaviour. Only the ‘show dogs in transit’ signs wind me up more.

Maybe it’s’ time the police prosecuted the dangerous parkers or the lorry drivers who play chicken with cars on the narrow lanes of the M6.

*******
Road planning is probably the oxymoron of all time. Around 18 months after completion of Walsall’s ring road, it is coned off again from Junction 10 into the town, this on top of traffic light failures continue to make this white elephant a delight for motorists.