I got engaged last week and could not be happier, writes Dan Wainwright.

You might have sensed a “but”. It’s not a big but or even a cautious however, there’s just a slight widening of the eyes and a deep breath followed by a gulp.

For along with what I wholeheartedly predict to be the start of a life of wedded bliss there are first the 12 months-plus of a gauntlet to run – organising the big event.

My fiancée (cue my embarrassing girly giggle of delight) and I now have to pick somewhere to get hitched and make a list of all the people we love, in order, to decide who we want to share our special day.

She has to find THE dress, I have to get hold of a suit that makes me look more Mr D’Arcy than Mr Steptoe and we both have to plan appropriate big nights or weekends with our best friends in the world that won’t leave us broke, sticky and confused in a foreign land.

I have to admit I’d be lost without my fiancée. Even though it was me who got down on one knee and popped the question, she’s the one with the vision and the incredible sense of planning to get this all done.

If the event was left in my hands we’d probably end up with kebabs for the wedding breakfast, after I mistakenly booked the caterers to turn up the week earlier.

I arrived home from work last night, a mere three days since our engagement, to find my other half sat at the kitchen table with two laptop computers open, one with a website with the umpteenth wedding venue she had perused that day, the other with a spreadsheet taking into account every minor detail.

Incidentally I should probably avoid the use of words like “minor”. There’s nothing minor about whether or not the price of the reception venue includes the use of a knife and cake stand. Other phrases to avoid if I still want to be invited include calling our wedding a “party” and referring to my future wife, even in jest, as “Bridezilla”.

She’s just better at this than me. The only important contribution a man can make to the organisation of his wedding is to agree with everything his bride to be says but to make it sound as though he’s actually given it consideration first. It’s not too hard. If my fiancée holds up two types of invitation I’ll just say “that one”. If, disappointed, she says “Oh, it’s just that I liked this one”, I can get out of the hole by staring hard, cocking my head to one side and saying “let me look at them both”, pausing thoughtfully for a minute before concluding “hmm, now that you mention it I do like this one”.

There is however another vital part of the planning process which, if I was even close to being an Alpha Male, would be my exclusive territory. I have to somehow find out when all the big football matches are in the year and make sure our wedding avoids the important fixtures, lest all our guests spend the evening watching Sky Sports News or checking the scores on their iPhones and Blackberries while they are meant to be getting on down to the Grease Megamix.

Sadly I am no such thing as an Alpha Male. In terms of the Greek alphabet I might be somewhere nearer to Epsilon and I’ll probably need some help. I had a look online and there are even forums where you can talk with other engaged or recently married people who can share the benefit of their experience.

However I was more than put off by the web based abbreviations. Apparently, as a husband to be, I have to introduce myself as an h2b. That makes me sound like a pencil.

So I’m going to have to search among my own friends and colleagues for someone who knows when all these big sport-related things take place who can do me a little chart.

Charts I can follow, instruction manuals are fine. But give me a choice between a traditional cake or the increasingly popular tradition of individual little cupcakes – you’d better ask the missus.