A poignant date ahead for Zubar

Wolves correspondent Tim Nash explains how defender Ronald Zubar has his own poignant date coming up next week away from the task in hand on the pitch.

For all the outpouring of emotion at Ireland’s World Cup agony, Wolves’ French defender Ronald Zubar is experiencing real grief. The 24-year-old goes into tomorrow’s clash at Chelsea preparing for a poignant date on his own calendar.

The death of his 22-year-old best friend Nicolas Rabot through cancer, two years ago next Wednesday, almost caused Zubar to quit football for good.

Grief strikes in many ways but when it affects one so young, it is especially hard to bear.

So stricken was the former Marseille defender that only his dying friend could persuade him to carry on playing.

Zubar said: “I used to live with my best friend, but he died two years ago, on November 25. He was born in Guaduloupe like me, and grew up in the house two yards away from mine, we went to school and had our exams together.

“He went to work in Caen when I played there and we lived together. He would have been 24 last month – his birthday was a month after mine.

“When I signed for Marseille, he stayed with me again and we lived together for four years. He had cancer of the lung, but it had also spread to his liver and chest by the time he died.

“After he died, it was very hard for me, I felt his death was such an injustice. I was young and healthy with lots of money, but I didn’t have my friend for the first time in my life.

“I wanted to help him as much as possible and I paid doctors from Paris and the USA to help him.

“He had an operation and stayed in hospital for two weeks so I paid for his mum and sister to come over from Guaduloupe, because I was training all the time and couldn’t stay at home.

“During those two weeks at home, he turned yellow because the cancer had spread to his liver. We called the doctor and he went for tests, and afterwards, the doctor turned to me and said, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t help your friend. ‘I think he only has two months to live’.

“I had to tell his mother the news. After that, I was desperate to find a solution and I called everyone. I spoke to my gaffer at Marseille and told him my head wasn’t right to train.

“So they gave me one week off and I was very grateful to my manager. My friend died a month later.”

The scale of his pain at the tragic loss ranged from financial to emotional as he tried to come to terms with the news, although Zubar would have given anything to reverse the ravages of the disease.

He said: “Just before he died, I rented an apartment for the family of my friend because he had five brothers and sisters to come over from Guaduloupe, so they could see him for the last time.

“They came over on the Tuesday and he was dead on the following Monday. I couldn’t be with him, because I was playing against Besiktas in the Champions League with Marseille.

“We left on Monday for the Wednesday night game and, when we landed, I found out he was dead.”

Stricken with grief at the loss, his form understandably dipped and Zubar struggled to cope.

He said: “I started making mistakes on the pitch, my head was all over the place. I wanted to stop playing football, I found everything difficult. He wasn’t just a friend to me, he was like a brother – everything.

“I’m OK now but even last season, it seemed like any mistake I made led to a goal.”

Feeling so low, and wrought with a burning sense of injustice, it’s hardly any wonder Zubar seriously considered quitting football for good.

But it was brave Nicolas who was there for his friend again as Zubar’s mate came to the rescue.

The player recalled: “I decided to play on as my friend wanted that. He would watch me play for Marseille and urge me to carry on, because he thought I could achieve a lot in the game.

“He said I had everything to succeed and told me I could play for the national team, so I want to prove him right by doing it on the pitch. I’d love to do that for our families and everyone in Guaduloupe who helped me.

“My dad Julien died in a car crash when I was seven after coming to Paris to find work. So it’s been hard for my mom.”

Zubar admits it took the arrival of his own daughter Clea in June to help him come to terms with the tragedy of losing his friend, which has given him a new appreciation of life.

He said: “I’m happy now – I have my baby who was born four months ago, my girlfriend Christel is happy. Now I feel different about life. Life is important, but you must try to enjoy it as much as possible, and respect your life.

“I’m now with Wolves in a new country. It’s a new challenge for everyone – it’s a new club with new fans. I’m really enjoying my time at the club.”

Tomorrow’s game has at least given Zubar a welcome distraction to what he must be feeling inside as the anniversary approaches.

Like the previous match against Arsenal, the former French under-21 international has been able to offer boss Mick McCarthy some advice on their opponents.

As a young player at Marseille, Zubar arrived just as striker Didier Drogba – who has been ruled out of tomorrow’s game with a broken rib – was leaving for Stamford Bridge in 2004.

But it’s his take on reformed super striker Nicolas Anelka that is telling.

He said: “I played against Anelka when he was at PSG and I was at Caen. But he’s a different player now. Before he was big-headed and he had a bad mentality.

“Since he’s been at Chelsea over the last two years, he’s played very well – he plays for the team.

“For me, Chelsea will probably win the league because they’re so strong. They’ve all played together for two to three years or more so they’re very co-ordinated and know each other’s games.

“But we’re preparing for the game with the mentality that we’re not going to lose.”

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